Gifts of love

A couple of days ago, I received the most lovely gift in the mail. My brother made a lap quilt for me and mailed it to me without my expecting it! It is absolutely beautiful, and it will keep me warm, but that's not what makes it so special. There's a little story behind it.

He and his wife have been retired for several years, and they live in their motorhome exploring the country. Every once-in-a-while, they find a place they like, and they stay for a few months. While they were in Nebraska last winter, he discovered the joys of quilting. It began with him helping his wife with her projects, then evolved to him making his own. I believe they started out making them to send to some type of charity, and that in itself is a beautiful thing.

This past December, he decided to make a lap quilt for our mom. She lives in an apartment alone, and she doesn't get to see any of her kids as much as she'd like (how many of us do?). But she sees him the least because they are travelling, and sometimes tied down with temporary jobs, or other obligations. So, I don't know if he has any idea how much she misses him, or how much this quilt must mean to her, but I know it means the world. When I saw the finished project he had sent my mom, I was so touched. It was just beautiful! Of course, in his humility, he says things like, "Don't look too closely, you'll see the flaws." But it is really lovely.

Well, my sister and I gushed all about it to him and told him what a nice job he had done and how much it meant to our mom. So here we are, two months later and he has created one for each of his three siblings. That's four of these beautiful works of love! He kept it a secret and sent them all out at the same time. They are all made of the same fabrics, so they are very similar, and he sewed them with some very intricate stitch patterns by machine. Each square has a different pattern of stiches; the more I look at it, the more patterns I discover. I had mine for a whole day before I realized that my name is stitched in one square! It is truly a work of art. And then, as if it all weren't amazing enough, he created a square on the back of each one telling the story of the family lap quilts. He included our names and the dates so that "100 years from now, when someone finds them, they'll know the story."

This may be the part that touched me the most. My big brother, who has no children himself, has created a beautiful legacy that I can hand down to my children. I know that so much love went into his work, and while he was stitching these works, he was thinking about us. He thought about each square and stitch and what we'd think when we found all the interesting surprises stitched into each one.

I miss my brother, I haven't seen him in...I'm not sure how long. But it is so nice to know that he was thinking of me while he worked on my gift. And when I'm cold and get to wrap myself up in it, I'll feel a little closer to him. Years from now, when my grandchildren wrap themselves up in it, I hope they'll think of him, and me, and everyone else who may have enjoyed its comfort. What a beautiful gift he has given our family.

Have a blessed day!

Ups and Downs

As some of you may already know, I took a tumble yesterday at work. No, like, I actually fell down all the way on the concrete to where I was lying down and my glasses had hit the pavement while they were still on my face! Since I work at a junior high school, I have always been uncomfortable walking through the campus during passing period. The kids are just flying through without looking where they're going, and half of them are taller than I am, so I feel like they can't even see me.

So there I was, tripping and falling and as I'm hitting the cement, I can hear chuckles! No lie! And then I see their feet continuing to pass me by. Thank God the Vice Principal was nearby or I'd probably still be sitting there!

It's amazing how many thoughts can go through your head in those brief seconds as you're plummetting toward the ground: Oh my gosh, not in front of the kids! I know I'm gonna break something! What do I look like right now as this is occurring? Seriously, I really had these thoughts. Psycho!

The cool thing is, I did not sustain any injuries! I mean, I am not in good shape physically, and all day long I kept saying, "Thank you, Jesus! It could have been so much worse!" Sure, my glasses were broken, but the Crazy Glue is working and I have a new pair on its way. But when I fell 15 years ago, I broke both of my elbows! That was rough! I could be really messed up right now.

I have decided that it wasn't an angel who protected me; it was Jesus Himself! Only He could have done such an amazing miracle! He just put His hand out and caught me! He is so awesome!

So, although I have some sore muscles, a small bruise, and a glue line on my glasses, I am so thankful for the protection the Lord extended to me yesterday! He is amazing!

Have a Blessed Day!

Heart Therapy

I'm happy to say I have survived another Valentine's Day, or as I like to call it, National Singles Awareness Day! Honestly, it can be so painful, or in the least, awkward. No other time of the year is it rubbed in my face so clearly that I don't have a "lover, significant other, husband, or whatever you might call it." Basically, it's the day that says "if you are without a partner, you are a loser."

When my kids were little, they'd bring home cute little cards and paper flowers made at school. As they got older, they'd give me some token of love that they had bought or made, and I always had gifts for them. That all made it somewhat more "do-able." However, now that they're grown-up, they have boyfriends or a husband to lavish their attention on, and I really don't think they are hoping for a valentine from their mommy when they have their menfolk to celebrate with.

So as I sat having my pity party yesterday, I received a couple of messages (or should I say valentines?) from God in the form of emails and prayers. One friend reminded me that I have so many people who love me. Another sent a valentine poem (albeit a little cheesy) "from God." Someone else suggested that I read the book of Ruth with Boaz in mind as God and Ruth as myself.

Once I finished my crying and ranting at God, I realized how much of a whiner I am. I decided to make a list of all the people who I know love me. Then I thanked God for the poem, which really did remind me of how much he loves me. Then I turned to my Bible. I am reminded that God is my husband for now. He provides for me even when I don't know it. He protects me. He is my Valentine every day.

I have so much more than some women do. Shame on me for feeling sorry for myself. I thank God for my family and friends, for His assurance that He loves me, and for the reality check that I don't need an earthly man to make me worthy. He is so good to me! He is the best Valentine I could ask for.

Have a blessed day!

Gotcha!

Okay, how many of us want to believe that we're pushovers? I know I certainly don't. But it has recently occurred to me that I have allowed myself to be manipulated by skilled professionals, and you may have been too!

I'm talking about those Superbowl commercials. I'm no big football fan, but I found myself sitting at home all alone with the Superbowl going just so I could see the commercials. Then, when I realized I had missed a lot of them because I had been busy, I went to youtube and watched them all! What on earth?! How did they get me to do that? I'll tell you how.

The commercials have become one of the best parts about watching the game, and there is so much hype leading up to the event that we just can't wait to see it all! How dumb is that? When else would I sit and search for commercials to watch? Never! In fact, one of the things I love about my DVR is that I can skip the commercials. But come Superbowl time, I'm one of those goofballs who sit and watch the commercials. Most of them are great, and this year there was the added hype about the Tebow spot which, by the way, was a great disappointment, but they're still just commercials. The advertisers' way of getting into my brain and manipulating me.

Although I didn't go out and buy a case of Doritos, and I didn't have an urge to break open a cold one, the masters of manipulation did get hold of my senses for a short while. They are really good at what they do. I can just picture them sitting there saying, "Gotcha!"

Have a blessed day!

too old too young

I said to Rose, "I need something to blog about." Her immediate reply, "Teen pregnancy, or Baybays havin' baybays." In her opionion, it's rampant in our small town. So I wonder, is it really? Or is it just the girls she knows? Or is teen pregnancy this bad everywhere now?

She says it's bad in this town because there's nothing else to do. Really? "I'm bored, why don't we make a baby." I don't think so. But there definitely seems to be an attitude at our local high school that having a baby is not such a big deal. It's not the tragedy that it used to be. I remember when a teenager got pregnant and everyone thought her life was over. Now, it almost seems like a badge of honor. I've heard the girls say, "It's so cute! I want a baby!"

Now don't get me wrong, I am glad the mothers are choosing life over abortion, but what ever happened to planning ahead? Birth control is free for teens (I won't even mention abstinence because we're talking about kids who can't wrap their heads around that concept). Kids these days have access to more information and resources than ever before, so why are so many girls having babies?

I don't have an answer. I'd really like to know what you all think. Do you think it's deliberate? Do they let it happen because they "need someone to love" like I hear on talk shows? What is up with these kids? Tell me what you think.

Have a blessed day!

Perspective

I am amazed at how easily my perspective can be affected by a small event. Yesterday, during class discussion, I started a list of topics that I thought may be relevant enough to blog about. Last night, when I arrived home I received a note in the mail that would turn my world upside down. Now, all I can think about is how this insignificant person who used to be a part of my life has, with one little note, changed my priorities. I have to blog about it in order to get past it.

You see, someone who used to matter to me (I'll call him Melvin) has pulled the proverbial rug out from under me, and now Rose and I will be suffering financially because of it. After a good cry, and a few hours of sleep, I had to go off to work. I was worried that I would be a basket case at work, but by the grace of God, I was given the opportunity to teach all three periods in the teacher's place (I work as an Instructional Assistant). My mind was occupied enough that I wasn't falling apart, but I couldn't wait to get home where I could wallow in my own self-pity. I pictured myself coming home and crying it out, giving myself permission to take a well-deserved nap. However, here I am telling you about it instead.

My mind has been consumed with how I'm going to have to contact Melvin (I love that I gave him that name) and tell him that he is such a...well, Melvin! Actually, the word that has run through my head all day is "douche," my daughter loves to use that word, but I'm too much of a lady, so I won't! Ha ha! The topics of discussion which sounded so interesting yesterday have taken a back seat to dealing with this injustice.

I know this all sounds sort of cryptic; I don't want to give certain details, but the point I want to get across is this: After sitting in the victim's seat for so long, I'm not willing to do it any more. Instead of crying myself into a couple of hours of oblivion, I've decided to take control and be proactive. After I write my response to Melvin, I will begin to plan my strategy. I have to figure out how Rose and I will get by with less income. I will create a budget (and stick to it), I will eliminate unnecessary expenses, I will change my attitude about being the victim. Most important, I will lean on God for support, He's the only One who will never let me down.

So, God will grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
He will give me courage to change the things I can.
He will give me wisdom to know the difference.
And best of all, He will ultimately give Melvin what he deserves. Ha ha!

I will go forth and make today a good day for my daughter and me. With or without Melvin's help.

There's always a choice.