Perspective

I am amazed at how easily my perspective can be affected by a small event. Yesterday, during class discussion, I started a list of topics that I thought may be relevant enough to blog about. Last night, when I arrived home I received a note in the mail that would turn my world upside down. Now, all I can think about is how this insignificant person who used to be a part of my life has, with one little note, changed my priorities. I have to blog about it in order to get past it.

You see, someone who used to matter to me (I'll call him Melvin) has pulled the proverbial rug out from under me, and now Rose and I will be suffering financially because of it. After a good cry, and a few hours of sleep, I had to go off to work. I was worried that I would be a basket case at work, but by the grace of God, I was given the opportunity to teach all three periods in the teacher's place (I work as an Instructional Assistant). My mind was occupied enough that I wasn't falling apart, but I couldn't wait to get home where I could wallow in my own self-pity. I pictured myself coming home and crying it out, giving myself permission to take a well-deserved nap. However, here I am telling you about it instead.

My mind has been consumed with how I'm going to have to contact Melvin (I love that I gave him that name) and tell him that he is such a...well, Melvin! Actually, the word that has run through my head all day is "douche," my daughter loves to use that word, but I'm too much of a lady, so I won't! Ha ha! The topics of discussion which sounded so interesting yesterday have taken a back seat to dealing with this injustice.

I know this all sounds sort of cryptic; I don't want to give certain details, but the point I want to get across is this: After sitting in the victim's seat for so long, I'm not willing to do it any more. Instead of crying myself into a couple of hours of oblivion, I've decided to take control and be proactive. After I write my response to Melvin, I will begin to plan my strategy. I have to figure out how Rose and I will get by with less income. I will create a budget (and stick to it), I will eliminate unnecessary expenses, I will change my attitude about being the victim. Most important, I will lean on God for support, He's the only One who will never let me down.

So, God will grant me serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
He will give me courage to change the things I can.
He will give me wisdom to know the difference.
And best of all, He will ultimately give Melvin what he deserves. Ha ha!

I will go forth and make today a good day for my daughter and me. With or without Melvin's help.

There's always a choice.